Sunday, June 05, 2011

Storms' Debris

As I was tending to my chickens this morning, I took another notice of the giant trees and limbs, short and long, as well as the remnants of the once-living leaves torn from their links to the life of the trees that the tornadic storms of last month left in my woods. They are all over the place, these remnants of fury, and they get under my feet and roll and threaten still to bring me down. They remind me of the debris in me that has been brought out of my secret unconscious into the light of my awareness by the recent "storms" in my life. An older storm left irreparable damage, but also strength to weather the more recent and furious storm of 14 months ago. This more recent storm, by far the most devastating, left behind as much debris in my life as the tornadoes of last month; but at least this psychic debris does not get under my feet and continue to threaten to trip me and bring me crashing down again as the round limbs and sticks of the trees in my woods brought down by nature's fury. This psychic debris has been, perhaps finally, brought into the light of awareness and, now that I can see it, actually helps me walk straighter, more calmly, more quietly, and more lovingly than before. These storms have cost me many "friends," or people whom I thought were friends, and one daughter; but they have left behind the very few people who are real, and they have reunited me with an old friend with whom I had lost contact.

I have not posted much anywhere on the internet for a very long time. Actually, I haven't felt the need to as I used to. I often wonder why people post their lives at all on the 'net, and why I ever did formerly. I think it is an overwhelming sense of aloneness that is epidemic in this frantic and fake society of ours. People have an innate need to expel from their hearts the hurts as well as share the joys of their lives, and all too often there is really no one to whom they can trust these gems of their souls. So, they post their lives publicly--casting their gems out into the indifferent ether--just because their hearts can't hold it any more.

Before there was blogging and vlogging, people used to keep private diaries and journals; which, for the most part, stayed private. This I think is healthier because unfortunately very few, if any, people (including some relatives) can be trusted with these gems. I like to think that it was enough for these people in our pasts to write secretly because their slower society allowed some real people in their lives that were able to give them the companionship that every soul craves--not like today in its frantic hurry in all directions. So, nowadays we wear our hearts on our sleeves on the internet because we cannot contain our souls, and we are not made to be alone.

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